1 June 2023
How the Mighty are Risen
by Paul Branch
Every dog has its day, and in many cases that day can be a long time coming. Some days can go on seemingly without end; for others it is but a flickering candle, burning brightly for a second or two and then a puff of breeze snuffs it out and the darkness returns. Days filled with brightness can be a period of joyful gratitude, but when the darkness sets in the joy turns to despair and the gratitude to bitterness. If you haven’t already figured out that the topic of this little essay is football, it’s probably best to look away now.
Whilst ironing the other day and listening to BBC Radio 5, an interesting question came up which stopped me halfway up my Armani jeans: how many clubs relegated from the Premier League have never returned? The answer given (with names) was 17, which seemed a lot … and soon there was a flurry of irate calls and texts from listeners, some decrying the inclusion of their precious team and others bemoaning the omission of theirs. You’d think this would be an easy one for Google to resolve, but it isn’t. So, after arduous and painstaking research I made the answer 11*, most of which would fall into the candle category of brightly flickering but short-lived. Others will still be recalling the good old days when they were a force to be reckoned with even before the Premier League arrived in 1992.
Premiership football today is big business, hard business, devoid of sentiment, no longer such a beautiful game but rather an investment vehicle for the deep-pocketed and certainly not for the faint-hearted. The footballing menu is dominated by a handful of very wealthy clubs funded by extremely well-heeled owners or investment institutions predominantly based abroad. Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchesters City and United, Newcastle and Tottenham are the chosen ones, and these by and large assume it’s their God-given right to be in and to remain in the top flight, to compete for and have a realistic chance of winning all the major league and Cup honours, and to qualify for that Holy Grail of European football, the Champions League. If, heaven forfend, they’re going through a bad patch — then the Europa League or the European Conference League will have to do to be getting on with.
Manchester United originally set the trend for foreign investment, but their noisy near neighbours City have upped the level considerably and profited handsomely in terms of success on the playing field, albeit at the expense of tiresome accusations of myriad breaches of regulations on financial fair play and rules related to profit and sustainability. Newcastle’s long overdue rise from the clutches of former owner Mike Ashley is thanks to the backing of the Saudi Public Investment Fund, said to be keen on emulating the Manchester City business model ….. heaven help us. Of the 20 richest clubs on the international stage, 11 ply their trade in our Premiership with the rest coming from Spain, Italy, Germany and France. As league champions Manchester City earned £170 million this season from the FA premiership. Bottom club Southampton took £128 million. This year’s Championship play-off final winners Luton Town will earn at least that amount for just that one match to get into the premiership, even if they were to be relegated next season. If you thought the money spent on the Coronation could have been better distributed elsewhere, that is but a drop in the ocean compared to what it takes to bankroll football and footballers.
There’s been a welcome resurgence at the smaller premiership clubs with some really punching way above their weight and showing just what can be achieved with minimal budgets but inspired management. An exception is the perennial under-achiever West Ham, darling of London’s East End, occupiers of an almost new (ex-Olympic) stadium pretty much gifted to them by local and national government save for a peppercorn rent, with owners prepared to invest in players of dubious ability using funds from various elements of the soft porn industry and erotic ladies’ undergarments, and only just surviving in the Premier League yet again by the combined graces of God and good fortune. Should they somehow manage to win the final of the European Conference League, West Ham can justifiably claim to be London’s most successful club this season. If not, then sadly and through gritted teeth it’s Arsenal. So let’s hear it for the boys in claret and blue, and by that I don’t mean Aston Villa, although it’s an easily made mistake according to football buff David Cameron.
Investors are attracted to the Premier League for a number of reasons: the gate money; appealing incentives for doing well in the league and gaining entry to European competitions; TV coverage provides huge income as well as wide exposure to encourage commercial sponsorships; and the quality of football played and the presence of talented players and managers from across the globe clearly enhance the overall package. But some would argue that the main attractions are the crowds themselves, creating an atmosphere like no other sporting event anywhere, and that it seems is what inspires investors to get involved and get their cheque books out.
Not all football clubs turn a profit though. In such cases it’s mainly down to the smaller owners to throw good money after bad in striving for footballing achievement. Good luck to Wrexham finally making their way back to the Football League from the depths of the National League with the help of Hollywood money, but there is one outstanding heartening example this season of a “local” owner of a lower league club achieving credit-worthy success. Having saved the best until last we can return to London’s eastern nether regions, to Brisbane Road, Leyton E10, previously known as the Stadium of Despair, where Leyton Orient have this season flown in the face of any reasonable expectation by winning League 2 comfortably (although there was a touch of nervousness towards the end). Orient have been through many lean years, far too many to dwell on but suffice to say there have been matches when a bucket has been passed among the crowd as a means of raising money to pay the staff. The Glory Year of 1962 saw promotion to the old First Division with home crowds around 30,000. From then on for the Mighty O’s it was a tale of a few very occasional highlights but gradual decline in the hands of various owners: Barry Hearn did his best with money earned from snooker and boxing promotions, but it wasn’t enough to prevent his successor, an Italian who thought he’d bought a piece of London real estate and not just a ropey football team, taking the club down, down into the National League. The renaissance under local lad Nigel Travis (Woodford born and former Dunkin’ Donuts chairman) has been a joy, reflected in crowds increasing from 2000 to 9000. Hopefully the joy will continue once he turns the current £2 million loss into some sort of profit. But at least it shows that, every once in a while, the Meek can become the Mighty and arise Phoenix-like from the ashes of despair to claim their just inheritance.
* For the connoisseur: Barnsley, Coventry, Sheffield Wednesday, Wimbledon, Blackpool, Bradford, Portsmouth, Swindon, Oldham, Huddersfield and Wigan (who managed to get relegated and win the FA Cup in the same week in 2013)
