13 December 2018

Diary of a Corbynista

Tories in Disarray

by Don Urquhart

6 December

To lighten the mood Day 6 of the Corbynista Advent Calendar has a Disney flavour.

Yesterday in the Commons Ian Blackford and Theresa May rehearsed their roles as Jiminy Cricket and Pinocchio in the Commons Christmas Revue.  He accuses her of lying about Uncle Ebenezer’s legal advice.

Cute the way her nose grew! How we all laughed!

7 December

Traditionally the innkeeper in the Nativity Play is an aging dour plebeian wearing a dishevelled modified tablecloth.  This year the House of Commons is taking an avant garde approach assigning the role to a well-groomed young fellow who delivers all of his lines with a fixed grin and a positive demeanour.  James Brokenshire is the Housing Minister who is telling 130,000 British children No Room at the Inn this Christmas and he is our Advent Calendar’s Day 7.

8 December

Reports of the gilets jaunes in France tell us that it is all about extremists on both sides combining to express revulsion at the political establishment.  Where have I heard that one before?

Never one to eschew a ride on a bandwagon our Foreign Secretary chooses this moment to warn of the insurrection that could result from a People’s Vote.  Here’s what he says in a Times podcast:

You’d have 48 per cent of the country who had voted to Leave twice. They would be incredibly angry and I wouldn’t rule out real social instability in this country.

And indeed it is Jeremy Hunt who lurks behind window 8 of our Advent Calendar portraying The Spirit of Christmas Yet to Come.

9 December

Back in the day the Probation Service was a highly respected profession.  Its privatisation was one of the first initiatives of the Coalition; many fine public servants were fired so that companies like Interserve could do the job on the cheap and provide a truly shabby service.

Interserve, one of the UK’s largest providers of public services is seeking a rescue deal as it struggles with £500m of debt.  Like Carillion before them their collapse will cause many to lose their jobs and send many small suppliers to the wall.

It’s a sad story, but not for all. Corbynista likes a happy ending so is pleased to report that the CEO received over £ 500,000 earlier this year for 4 months work.  Her name is Debbie White and she is our pantomime Snow White behind Advent Calendar window 9.

10 December

Behind Window 10 is a fine old building called Muckamore Abbey the setting of our Christmas horror story.  So the story goes, in this building people described as patients are subjected to evil tortures for the delectation of people described as staff.  Many well-fed yet well-intentioned people described as executives do nothing as do others called regulators.

An unlikely story but it’s all true and happening in Antrim today.  Here’s the BBC article:

Muckamore Abbey seclusion room was ‘dark dungeon’

11 December

With slack jaw I watched Theresa May kick the Irish border can down the road yet again.  It all takes a long time and massive resources just to keep this person in No. 10 for a couple more days.

The silver lining is that Ian Howgate was interviewed in one of the few non-Brexit news items. This gentleman had represented himself in tribunals because legal aid was not available.  He was destitute and suffering from mental health problems, his family was disintegrating.  But he picked himself up, took on the legal establishment and won.

In the Corbynista panto he will be playing Jack the Giant Killer and is behind Window 11.

12 December

We have just watched Theresa May on the steps of Downing Street telling us what a bang up job she has been doing all in the national interest.  She has some wayward MPs who if they have their way will put the black hearted Corbyn and McDonnell  in power, and anyway if they discard her this evening the new leader will not have time to do a proper job on Brexit.

She is behind Window 12 representing The Spirit of Christmas Past.