Diary of a Corbynista

Thumbnail Don Urquhart Red Sky Lenin Cast of Play Red Dawn

21 April 2022

Diary of a Corbynista

Sick Cat Bounce

by Don Urquhart

Mug shot of Don Urquhart

I used to be trusted with the Waitrose shopping on a Saturday.  Furtively I would thrust a Daily Telegraph to the bottom of the trolley and tremble before the withering glare of Meera the check-out operator.  I shrugged:

The wife likes the General Knowledge Crossword.

That was years ago and now in normal times Telegraph, Sun, Express, Mail and Times do not cross the Corbynista portals unless at Christmas they promise decent quizzes.

Recently we have had a change of policy which I should explain.

Over Easter there was plenty of bad news. 

The Prime Minister and the Chancellor received fixed penalty notices for partying during lockdown.  The Home Secretary went to Rwanda to sign up a deal for sending refugees there.  This all seemed poorly thought through.  What made it worse was the sponsorship deal the Arsenal has with Rwanda.  Visit Rwanda is something we are admonished to do whenever visiting the Emirates Stadium and we are expected to buy replica shirts containing the same message.  All sorts of busybodies are now virtue signalling about that country’s human rights record.  All I can say is that you don’t get to be a country’s President for 20 years without being a pretty good egg. 

Meanwhile Grant Shapps is still furious about P&O Ferries firing 800 UK staff and replacing them with cheaper foreigners.  At first he sounded like King Lear:

 I will do such things—
What they are, yet I know not, but they shall be
The terrors of the earth!”

And we still don’t know what they shall be.  Legal action?  Staff reinstated?  No sign. 

The Chancellor defended his wife’s tax arrangements.  He was most upset that they had been leaked.  I reflected that he had been checking my wife’s tax arrangements for several years without any comeback from me. I can’t get my head around this non-dom business.  So many of my acquaintance are Plastic Paddies.  Cake and eat it doesn’t start to describe it.

In the papers the troubled ministers – Johnson, Sunak, Shapps, Patel and the rest are quoted and pictured.  While normally this would be one more reason to give the newsstands the go by we started buying up in bulk.

Sad to say our cat is unwell and unable to make it into the garden to do her business. But she has spotted the area indoors designated for her ablutions.  Here she finds the Tory rags adorned with the faces of our leaders.  I am not sure if she takes as much pleasure in defecating upon them as I have in watching her.

And a couple of days ago a big bonus when The Times had a Jeremy Clarkson special edition.


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